We Can't Go Back.....

You ever make a decision that you know you can't go back on? Or a decision that you said you wouldn't make and in a moment of weakness, you cave and then you realize you can't go back and it feels too late? I woke up to that feeling this morning as I listened to the kids playing Game Cube and fighting over who was losing, who was bumping into their car on the track, etc. I ate my words over Christmas break. Years back, I said we would not have video games in our home because of the obsessive compulsiveness in our children. Then the kids had enough money from Christmas that if they put it ALL together, they could buy the Game Cube and a few games and that was what the three of them wanted to do. So we said if that was what they wanted, they could which I thought was pretty cool that they all wanted to share their money and have something together. So now we have this Game Cube and I don't know why they named it Game Cube. They really should call it Game Hell because all it does is bring out the worse in you when you play it. The nature of "I want to be first", "me first", "I'm better", etc. is so ugly!!!! I mean, it is outright ugly particularly when you watch your children all treat each other with such pride and arrogance ... from a mother's perspective, it is gut-wrenching to watch and against everything we have tried to instill in them.

The question is what do we do now when I simply want to throw the Game Hell out. I can always count on Scott to bring me back down to earth. "Marsha, do we live in Amish country because unless we are willing to move to Amish country, then we are going to have to learn to live in this world where technology is readily available and realize that our kids are NOT going to grow up in a world like we did. So maybe we should have days, not times, that they can play Game Hell and days they do not. How about Tues/Thurs/Sat is a day that they can play Game Hell for a set amount of time and the other DAYS, they don't play it at all." I like that idea a lot. Do I have a point? I don't know if I do at this point. All I know is I feel like I get up every day to a new challenge, a new situation, an ever changing Babylonian world and some days, aren't you just tired? I told someone a few weeks ago, "I want to go back." And she said, "You can't go back. You can't get back into the Garden. It's closed." I can laugh now .... I am getting so old aren't I? Whatever happened to playing with rocks and water hoses???? Climbing trees??? Riding bikes for hours ........ every time I turn around, my answers to everything lately have been all tied back to one thing. We can't go back.